Getting sex ready

Getting sex ready is a must!! Here are some tips on getting sex ready and can be done in under 20 mins.

First and formost everything needs to be clean! 

1. Your ass- the main cause of any possible smell in your lower area! So clean that ass! Either take a shower or what I do when I don’t have time is run the bath and go on all fours with my ass under the running water, grab that soap (I use dove and it’s amazing) and get that ass and crack sudsy! Now now, some of you may be a little nervous about ass play but if you clean that thang good you’ll be more tempted for ass play and let me tell you there’s nothing more sexy than a hot tounge on your asshole…. When cleaning your hole –You don’t want to get soap stuck in there so use some of the suds and your pointer finger and glide it in and out of your ass making sure it’s. Clean and not…uhhhh shitty! Once you know your ass is on point it’s time to move on to your vag!

2.Your good girl aka your pussy, vag, vagina, va-jay jay- ya box- your dirty Sally — look, what  whatever the hell you call it– it’s time to make it as soft as a baby’s bottom and smelling of light sweet scents so irrisistable that your partner will eat you like it was their last meal!

— I prefer no hair–some like runways —-some like prickles — some like a beautiful 80’s bush– 

-now this tip I have refers to the ladies that have some lip and or pubic area hairless.

—-for a really close shave let your vag soak in a tub for 10 mins(don’t need to run a huge bath just enough to cover your ginaaa. Then use either shaving cream (prepare for possible smelling mannish ) soap all sudsy or condition works fine. Lather her up and squat down (refer to the vagaina shave meme I drew) and VERY carefully shave- if you’ve had a few to drink be extra careful! Chances are your man had a few to drink too and isn’t even realizing how long you are taking! 

—– now rinse off everything— 

*dont forget the pits*

—– once out of the shower squat down again and grab a towel and rub it quickly with pressure around your  vagina. What this does is make your vag ever sooo soft and smooth! Some girls have an already soft and smooth puss but this elevates it! Other girls get dry skin after shaving and this helps tremendously! (Always remember the more confidant you are with your body the more sexual you will be!

—–next slather on some extra virgin coconut oil! I used Spectrum organic because it’s inexpensive and smells like real sweet coconut. I even add a sprinkle of a sweet very light pheromone powder. Adds a sweetness to your pussy that a man can’t handle and It seems like it’s “all you”. SIDEnote- I hear eating pineapple really sweetness your juices!

– I don’t recommend eating asparagus with in hours of having sex– weird smelling pee and you don’t want that when a guy might ravage your lady parts!

3. Your mouth because kissing is sexy and bad breath isn’t.

—- I came up with a clever way to not only have fresh smelling breath but to also have a sweetness about you that isn’t mint and makes for very fabulous kisses.

—— brush your teeth and tounge and use mouth wash if you can— actually if you are planning on using mouth wash do it before you brush (some mouth washes have a strong smell) now after your teeth are clean and minty you are good to go. If you want to add a little bonus for your lover– I take my toddlers tooth paste some FUCKKNG berry flavor and swish that shit around in my mouth. For those with out kids, they are only like 4 bucks and well worth it! Now your mouth is clean with a sweet Taste for your lover. 

—- now take your clean self go light a candle maybe even play some sexy music. You can now do what ever you please— dress innocent — dress like fucking whore or simply just naked— ‘he doesn’t give a fuck– he just wants your mouth on his cock, your pussy on his face and his big D in you.

I hope these tips give you all the confidence in the world with your beautiful self!

My next blog post will talk about possible outfits and some easy role plays that will get him all fired up and horny!


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Cleanliness is next to sexiness

Let’s face it, if your ass smells, do you really want someone’s face in it? Fuck no! I find that you need to have a very clean body to feel comfortable in the sack. Don’t fuck if you’re not clean, end of story! (unless it turns you both on) For example– Suzy was at work all day at the bank and even though she never got sweaty or over heated, it has been 9 hours since her shower and her last ass/clam cleanse. Yeah well fucking Suzy may be lucky and have a rose smelling ass but if your man wanted to lick your asshole later you would probably think twice! What happens when you think twice? You nudge is face away and sex just got less hot! If  your man wants to lick your ass, it feels amazing, so let him… Let him lick your ass. That’s why keeping clean before sex is a must. The cleaner you are the more confident you’ll be and boom fucking hot sex all over the place! That goes for men also —smelly balls is a turn off! I am tired and am off to bed but I have a lot of cleaning secrets of making a soft as a peach va jay jay and the sweetest smells. Good night you lovely people! Mwuah!

Why sex?

Sex is natural yet something we have to fit into our busy schedules. If everyone was having better sex people would be happier. So it’s time to fuck like you mean it! The key to the best—make you cum and scream and be fucking comatosed—-sex is to find out what makes your lover tick. In example does he like his balls licked, to bush or not to bush that is the question! If he is a good lovah he will do the same for you. —oh she screams when I suck her clit–

Now, now, now I know this isn’t easy right off the bat,but I’d say 3rd time in and you can start to feel them out. 

I am having the best sex of my life and I want to share it with you so you don’t have to wait 15 years of ok sex like me. I’m a normal, sweet, funny little Scorpio  mama who has no filter and a big heart! Hope to make you cum…. Not while ya read! 😉


#sex